Do Not Wait. Reach Out.

Many people do not know or remember this random fact about me; for a short period of about six months in 2006, I was employed through a temp agency as an Administrative Assistant at the top of the Fox Theatre in downtown Detroit. The Production Manager, Lee Rifield and I were instant friends and continued a friendship long after I had left this position. He was one of the most kind, loving, funny and unique individuals I still have ever crossed paths with.

We always stayed in contact (mostly via text and email since he was not a big fan of social media), he was like a big brother who always had words of wisdom for me; and even helped give me some direction in life when I first met him. Sometimes a few years would pass and then we would reach out to each other and catch up. I got on Facebook today to reach out and realized we had not talked in almost five years. I was deeply saddened to find that Lee had encountered a massive heart attack four days after his 50th birthday in 2016 and had passed away. What a blow.

Time is not always on our side. I am always saying, “When you think of someone, reach out and say hi. See how they are doing.” I wish now, more than ever I had taken my own advice. There were numerous times I had thought of Lee and did not reach out and just thought, “we will catch up at some point, I’m sure he is busy with shows and doing well”. I have learned my lesson. I will never wait because tomorrow is not promised, and Lee has proven that to me. He probably is laughing because he always had wisdom to give me; well this is some serious wisdom, thanks Lee!

Lee had a passion for music I had never seen and still have never seen in any other human. I used to play my grandfather’s violin in elementary and middle school, and quite honestly did not know what to do with the violin once I was in my 20s. Lee had told me he wanted to play violin, so I knew handing it over to him would never leave me with any regret. I learned from Lee’s sister today that she just recently gave the violin to one of Lee’s best friends, who apparently has the same passion for music. It warmed my heart to hear what the next chapter is for the beautifully old violin.

Lee knew an abundance of very well known musicians and individuals that could be or are called famous, but it did not matter who anyone was to him. Lee treated everyone the same, all the time; with kindness, respect, love and dignity.

I kept some of the emails between Lee and I over the years because his words were always inspiring and meant a lot to me. I pulled my favorite one up today and of course my eyes welled with tears. I wanted to share some of his words in this blog.

“I still believe what I have always believed about you. You are an extraordinary person, and I don’t want to see you get bogged down in the world as most of us have or will. I never want you to have a jobby-job, I am hopeful and still believe there is something more for you out there. I know you have to eat and pay bills and all that. I also know that every three of four years your life begins to push you in a particular direction. To ignore that push is folly. To deny that push is impossible. To realize it and take it where it wants to lead you seems difficult. You can do it Ames…you can. I know, I know…I’m philosophizing a lot here, but…I mean it all…”

THAT is AMAZING to me! Lee was amazing to me. Lee still is amazing to me. The irony that I am currently on a new, exciting path in life that I have never been on before has arisen, and I find myself reading an email from Lee that is from 9 years ago. I believe in signs and I also believe Lee is saying “go for it Ames, no more regular jobby-job. Live your dreams!” I can certainly say I promise Lee I won't just settle for a "jobby-job"!

I also feel as though I have gained a friend today, Lee’s sister. Her and I had a wonderful conversation today, and we both are happy to have connected with one another. Thanks for the silver lining Lee!

THANK YOU for being my friend, Lee. Thank you for touching my life in such a profound way. Thank you for always philosophizing. Thank you for helping me navigate life. Thank you for teaching me more about music. Thank you for being YOU. Thank you for being an amazing spirit that I know is still with me today. We will forever be friends and I hope you are enjoying some heavenly jam sessions!

DO NOT WAIT. REACH OUT.

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